Maya Rose

On July 10, Dan and I brought the newest, most precious member of our family into the world:  Maya Rose.  It has taken me too long to get this blog typed, but I have been kinda busy!  I'll attempt to summarize my thoughts and experiences thus far into this blog.

1.  Childbirth was not as scary as I thought it was going to be.  My body totally took control, did exactly what it was supposed to do and I had a fairly easy labor and delivery.  I also had an epidural and I'm not ashamed of that fact. :)  My water broke on a Tuesday at about 1:30 a.m.  I woke Dan up and said, "I think it's time to go to the hospital!"  Neither of us were in a huge hurry, but, there was a certain amount of scurrying that went on at that time.  We gathered up some last minute things and off we went to the hospital.  I don't remember much of the drive there because I was focused on my contractions.  I was really excited and little nervous, too.  We got there at about 2 a.m. and by 2:30, I was sporting the oh-so-attractive hospital gown and hooked up to lots of different machines that were tracking my blood pressure, my contractions, my heart rate, the baby's heartbeat, and giving me fluids.  About an hour and a half and several nearly unbearable contractions later, the nurse anesthetist came to the rescue to administer the epidural.  It worked on the left side, but I still felt every contraction on my right side.  (He blamed it on my red hair!)  While it was painful, I think it helped me when it came time to push.  I labored until about 9 a.m. and then it was time to push!  I had some serious anxiety about this because I thought everything was just going so fast!!  Dan talked me through it, we prayed, and I pushed for an hour and twenty minutes before we met our sweet, sweet Maya.  We cried and cried and thanked the Lord for our precious gift.  There is no other feeling quite like the first second you meet your own flesh and blood.

2.  Breastfeeding is hard.  There's not much more I have to say about that besides that the lactation consultants at our hospital are UH.MAZ.ZING.  I cannot imagine a more passionate, caring, kind, dedicated, patient, meant-for-their-jobs set of nurses anywhere.  We're hanging in there, but jeez.  It's like a dang full-time job!  I am happy to report that Maya is gaining weight and we've not had to supplement with formula so far.  It's just extremely time consuming and, at times, frustrating!

3.  I have no idea how single moms do it.  I have been so blessed with an amazing husband, friends and family who have been so much a part of this journey.  Dan is such a wonderful daddy and has played suuuuuch a huge role in Maya's first couple weeks of life.  Despite not having much experience with newborns, he has not hesitated to do any task.  He's a total natural!  As much as I could just stare at my baby girl all day long, it's really nice to be able to do basic things, like go to the bathroom and take a shower, while I know she's hanging out in her daddy's arms.  We've also gotten a ton of help from our family...everything from making food to grocery shopping to cleaning our house to watering our plants to taking the dog for a walk!  We've also been receiving meals since the day we got home from the hospital, either from family or friends.  I seriously have no idea how women do this alone!

4.  The baby blues are no joke.  No one told me about "Day 2."  Our 2nd day in the hospital brought on something a little new for me - uncontrollable crying for apparently no reason at all.  I was as happy as I could be, yet could not stop crying!  This lasted throughout our hospital stay and even as they were wheeling me out to our car to be discharged from the hospital, I was a fountain of tears that just wouldn't stop.  I felt so silly.  I wasn't prepared for that feeling.  It still hasn't quite subsided, but at least now I feel like the crying is for a reason - sleep deprivation being the primary culprit, with the thought of having to return to work a close second.  I don't feel depressed, but find that I cry extremely easily.  This is mostly brought on by thoughts like this: "Another day has come and gone - she is already growing up too fast!" "I can't imagine going back to work and only getting to spend 4-5 hours with her (at the most!) in the evening."  "This is a lot of work and I am exhausted."  " Why can't I make my baby girl stop crying - I must be a terrible mother!"  And so on and so forth.  Fortunately, I have an amazing husband who is there to listen to me and reassure me after each tear falls. 

5.  I never could have imagined a love like this.  And I can't explain it either.  It's different than I thought it would be.  She is my whole world and my heart is so full of love for our new daughter and our little family.  It also has made me love and appreciate Dan in a new, bigger, deeper way.  It fills my heart with so much joy (to the point of tears!) to see Dan holding or singing to our sweet girl.

Of course there is so much more I have learned in these two weeks.  I have a little girl who is waking up though, so I'll leave you with some pictures of our sweetie pie.

First diaper!

Our family :)

Daddy time 

Mommy time

Sweet baby

Milk coma :)

Hope you're ready for lots more Maya updates!  Thank you to everyone who has offered well wishes, support, kind words, meals, etc., etc., etc.  We are so thankful for you!